Initiating Body Image Conversations…with your teens
I previously talked about normalizing conversations with kids and teens about how it is natural to gain weight as we grow. In fact, it is common and expected.
However, body change comes with weight gain, and this is what is difficult for some teens to adjust to. So, how do you initiate a conversation about body image with your teen?
When beginning the talk, remember that you want your child to feel that the conversation is safe and you are open to their thoughts and reactions. This will make them feel secure and confident in discussing this normal topic.
Focus on health and functionality over appearance, validate their feelings, and listen actively. Use opportunities like social media exposure to discuss unrealistic body standards while emphasizing your unconditional love and acceptance regardless of their physical appearance. Be mindful of your own language and avoid making negative comments about your body or others' bodies around them.
Talk openly about loving yourself and other people without connecting it to appearance.
Practice food neutrality—it's best to talk about food simply as nourishment for our bodies, not as good or bad, healthy or unhealthy
Key points to remember:
Start early and keep it on-going: Begin discussing body image during puberty and continue to have open conversations throughout their teenage years.
Choose natural moments: Don't force a "formal" conversation; instead, weave body image discussions into everyday situations, like watching TV or discussing social media posts.
Focus on health, not appearance: Emphasize the importance of healthy habits like exercise and nutrition rather than fixating on weight or body shape.
Validate their feelings: Let your teen know that it's normal to have concerns about their body and that you're there to listen without judgment.
Be a positive role model: Practice self-care and talk openly about your own positive body image (even if you don’t feel it).
Talk about media influence: Discuss how social media and advertising can portray unrealistic body standards and encourage critical thinking about these images.
Use "I" statements: Share your own experiences with body image struggles (if appropriate) to show empathy and understanding.
Ask open-ended questions: Encourage your teen to share their thoughts and feelings by asking questions like "How do you feel about your body?" or "What are some things you like about yourself?"
Compliment non-physical attributes: Focus on praising your teen's personality, achievements, skills, and positive qualities rather than just their appearance.
You are your child's most important influence. You can help your teen cope with messages about their bodies and outside influences that are unrealistic.
I am available, too, to help you have effective conversations with your child.
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